The Girl Who Cried, "Final Round"

Oh boy!, So I went in for my last round of chemo yesterday, and they had to postpone it again! My levels were the same! Very low and too low for treatment. I was shocked. I have been feeling so well that it was hard to believe that it was happening again. Well, you better believe i'm not going to be talking about 'my final round of chemo' anymore haha!

*Here I am yesterday, still thinking round 6 was going to happen. Psych! I even wore my "Best Day Ever" sweatshirt. haha (sweatshirt from Best Day Everything)

*Henna on my head to celebrate this whole cancer thing coming to an end! It needs to end, i'm running out of creative ideas ;) (Henna done by Mountain Mehndi)

Anyways, here's what's going to happen. We'll give my body one more week to recover, and if my levels get high enough for chemo, we'll go ahead with the 6th, and last treatment. If they don't go up, they'll call it quits on that 6th treatment, we'll wait for a few weeks, get a PET scan, and pray that everything is clear. If it is, i'm done!, and all should be well. If it's not clear, that'd mean the thing we were trying so hard to avoid...radiation.

In short, we want my levels to go up so I can have one more treatment and be able to stick with the plan. The whole reason for this very yucky and intensive chemo treatment that i've been doing was to avoid radiation, so i'll be praying that that can still be possible.

Everyone is so considerate and worries about how i'm feeling. Thank you, I am doing well. Yes, I am so done with cancer and am ready for this to be a distant memory, but at least the end is in sight. I am just happy to be feeling so well! I really can't complain about having another week to enjoy taking care of my sweet children, spending time with my family, and having some normalcy.

I am starting to feel anxious about that upcoming PET scan though. I've always felt confident when thinking about it, but after yesterday, i'm pretty nervous. BUT living in fear is no way to live. I'll just keep praying, fighting, and let faith replace any doubts or concerns I have. It will all work out how it's supposed to, so it won't do any good to worry.

Just like this scripture says,

"...whosoever shall put their trust in God shall be supported in their trials, and their troubles, and their afflictions, and shall be lifted up at the last day."

Alma 36:3

Xoxo Jen

P.S. One of my very favorite things is coming up...GENERAL CONFERENCE! I absolutely love general conference, and my love for it grows more and more as time goes by. It's probably because I realize I need more and more help and life gets more and more stressful ha.

But something that I have been doing for the last few years is coming up with "General Conference Questions." It all started when Jake and I were living with my parents while building our home. One evening, for family night , we started talking about the upcoming conference and about how blessed we were to be able to listen to, and learn from, modern day prophets. I gave each person a little handout, where they were to ponder and write down some questions they had. They could be about anything. For me, my questions usually have a lot to do with wanting to be a better mom, serving more, scripture study, and being more diligent and obedient.

We each took some time to come up with a few questions, then we went around and shared a few of them with each other. They were all so different.

In the couple weeks leading up to conference, we all pondered and prayed, every day, about our questions. What a beautiful conference that turned out to be. I had never felt the spirit so strong while listening to all of the sessions. After conference, we got back together, and talked about our experiences. I will have you know, EVERY SINGLE ONE of our questions were answered.

Right now, I have a list in my phone that I have been adding question to for the upcoming general conference. I know that if I pray and prepare myself to be taught by the spirit and the prophets, that every one of those questions will be answered. I am so grateful for the comfort, guidance, and hope I receive through general conference. I know that Heavenly Father hears us and is anxious to help us. He will speak to us through His servants, all we need to do is be active in listening, then put to action what we have been taught.

Here's to making your list of "General Conference Questions," CHEERS!